So let’s get old school here.


I mean, seems like it wouldn’t make a difference in creating a hot sex life, but if you’re like countless married ladies that feel like sex has gotten boring and er, complicated… listen up.

Attraction, while it’s seems like a magic, fickle arrow, is actually just a feeling.

A feeling from a thought in your head.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But, common. Mikonos 2009?

Was that thoughts or just  pure HOTNESS??

Vegas hotel party 2012?

Magic was definitely in the air.

That one time when you guys snuck out behind the bandstand after so-n-so’s wedding reception… in public!?

CHEMISTRY … or hmmph, maybe thoughts?

Cupid may have had his way with you, but you are not out of luck… you have the power DECIDE to be attracted.

SO. When creating desire, you need to recruit your imagination.

Simple. Not easy.

Sometimes you need help creating sexier thoughts ammiright?

Step one: Notice the NOT sexy thoughts 
– ugh, gross he’s farting SO loud.
– why is he SO annoying?
– Here we go again…

Step two: Train your brain to PRACTICE sexy thoughts
– well…. he is a pretty good cook.
– I love his shoulders
– I love the way his hands hold  (fill in the blank)
– man, his voice is sexy on the phone.

It’s the same thing your brain did when you first met — Focused on the sexy.

oh and then —

Step three: remember the sexy context we’ve been talking about? Yeah, keep creating situations, routines, and habits that ease you into pleasure, connection and sex-positive vibes.
– an inviting, clutter free bed
– dressing in a way you feel beautiful
– scheduling a romantic (echem SEXy) evening dedicated to intimate connection.
– Write some love letters. About him. FOR YOU.


Writing little love letters is for YOU to remind yourself of all the little thoughts that had you daydreaming up a wet storm not that long ago.

Like, literally, sit down and write it all out.
Then read it back.
Think about.
Imagine alllll these things.

And hey! If you’re serious about shaking some LIFE back into your relationship,

Oh oh oh! and here’s this week’s meditation!

Get solo.Be naked.
Remember your BODY IS POETIC.

Here’s This Week’s BNM link: #8 Body Love Poetry