Happy Monday my friends,
We have been under some sort of tropical depression here in Florida. So we are in the midst of moving boxes, quarantine, and all cooped up indoors…and I’ve been feeling UNDER this weather.
None of these circumstances typically bother me, however this particular weekend, I’ve been sloshing of HEAVY dose of negative emotions and it has me looking outside and seeing only dreary, foreboding, doomy weather.
So, I have been thinking quite a bit about “sitting” with negative emotions without trying to “fix” them, change the situation or control others in order to feel better.
I’ve also noticed my body’s inclination to hang onto the tension and resist ANY pleasure, besides sleep.
No doubt, to physically experience a negative emotion feels terrible!
It’s tight, heavy, exhausting, like a heavy rock in your stomach, shortness of breath, numbing in your hands and feet or even such a thing as “psychologically induced fevers” …
So don’t underestimate the power of your mind rippling into your body.
How is the best way to care for yourself and emotions, and NOT let the house, the family and your work fall to pieces?
Let’s keep on the weather analogy, shall we?
- Name the weather.
Notice the emotion like the weather outside. Simply name the emotion you’re experiencing – oh, this is anxiety. Hmm, that’s shame, regret, disappointment, fear of the unknown, uncertainty, scarcity…etc. If you can’t even pinpoint the emotion, just notice how it feels in your body.
- Sit in the rain.
UGH I know this is the least exciting news. But if you let it wash over you, less concerned with your hair getting wet you can just be in the rain with less resistance. This means observing the emotions, breathing into them, getting curious about them without trying to delete them (or yourself in the process).
- Shake it out.
Literally as per my coach’s recommendation this weekend, keep shaking your body loose to remind it that the emotions are moveable. Kinda like the rain can keep rolling off you. BREATHE here.
- Smell the air.
Notice that alive oxygen smell and water around you, without stopping the rain or wishing for sun. Right in the midst of the storm, you can also invite a sensorial pleasure.
What smells relax you? Find them and breathe them in. (I’ve been loving lavender essential oil)
What feels good on your skin? Put that on.
What is your body asking for? listen and follow suit (less coffee and wine? More water and tea?)
Invite the pleasures slowing into you & couple them with more loving thoughts.
- This too shall pass.
Seek your shelter, take your time. These rainclouds are temporary and WILL pass through… The answer isn’t in boxing up the sky, railing against the heavens or wailing for the ole sunny days.
I WILL pass…and yup, eventually another storm will come and go.
Our work is not to live the hedonist life of 100% pleasure and gluttony.
It is to be present with what our bodies are experiencing AND know our minds CREATE and TEMPER all weather systems.
In the midst of the shit storm, before you go deleting all negative thoughts, just know you CAN feel the rain.
The rain isn’t NOT supposed to be here.
We need it. We want it and the life it can bring.
And, we don’t need to get swept away in it in the flood.
It is always OUR storm and when we let it flow, keep tuning into why the weather seems so dramatic, we can navigate things with compassion, grace, breath and power.
Pleasure is the salve, and even in the pain, there is relief in the tiniest moments of ease, softness, and love.